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Domestic abuse isn’t just physical. There are lots of different kinds of abuse, including emotional, sexual and controlling behaviour.

If you answer yes to any of the below questions you might be in an abusive relationship.

Do they:

• physically hurt you? Physical abuse can mean anything from slaps, pushes, kicks, blows, shaking, strangulation, and ultimately, murder.
• belittle you, or put you down?
• threaten to harm you or harass you?
• blame you for the abuse or arguments?
• deny that abuse is happening, or downplay it?
• isolate you from your family and friends?
• stop you going to college or work?
• make unreasonable demands for your attention?
• get angry or offended quickly and easily?
• accuse you of flirting or having affairs?
• tell you what to wear, who to see, where to go, and what to think?
• destroy or damage your property?
• control your money, or not give you enough to buy food or other essential things?
• monitor your social media profiles, share photos or videos of you without your consent or use GPS locators to know where you are?
• force you to have sex, hurt you sexually, or ask you to do sexual acts that you don't want to do?
• threaten to take your children away from you?
• threaten you with harm if you were to ever leave?

Indicators of an abuser

Are you abusive to your partner or spouse?  Abuse includes using anger as a control tool as well as being physically violent towards your partner.

Do you:

• hit, push, choke, kick, hold them against their will? Or do any act against your partner that results in any injury in any form?
• ever threaten to hurt them (hold a fist to their head) or threaten to kill them?
• destroy property when you're angry?
• tell your partner that they are worthless or stupid?
• call your partner names, and tell them that they are having sex with other people?
• act in a jealous and possessive way, accusing them and making them account for their daily activities?
• tell them they are a useless parent and threaten to take the children away from them?
• withhold money from them and make them account for every penny they spend?

Domestic abuse can mean a lot of things - you can use words or actions or both.

For further advice and help, please visit the Respect Phoneline website and Cranstoun website.